The Up and Up

About six months ago, I was getting ready for the SATs. The day before I had a minor nervous breakdown, the product of several months of loneliness and an incredible amount of homework. I remember that Friday-before-SATs clearly. It felt like you feel after you've cried for a very long time.

I called it the Day It All Fell Apart.

I went shopping for my homecoming clutch that day, and would go on to have an amazing homecoming with friends in Faulkner. I would get my 800 verbal on the SATs the next day.

Where am I now? I am happy. I am incredibly happy. I'm working hard but I enjoy it-- most of it-- and I have friends and I love the people I'm surrounded with. I've overcome a lot of my crazy self-expectations, and set some better ones. I haven't had to fall apart much. I'm going to prom in two weeks with one of my best friends from Faulkner. I need to raise my math score by like 60 points, if possible. We'll see. Relient K, as always, has words of wisdom.

To be prosperous
Would not require much of me
You see contentment is the one thing
It entails

To be content with where I am
And getting where I need to be
I'm moving past the past
Where I have failed

But I'm finally catching onto it
And now the past is just a conduit
Right there at the end
Is where I'll be
Oh

Cause I'm on the up and up
I'm on the up and up
And I haven't given up
Given up on what
What I've gained from love

And I'm on the up and up
I'm on the up and up
Yeah there's nothing left to prove
Cause I'm just trying to be
A better version of me
For you
A better version of me
For you

- Relient K, Up and Up